Blind date

I went through a “phase” when I was in college. It started at the end of my sophomore year. I was set up by a friend with one of her friends from high school. I trusted my friend Leah and agreed to go on this double date. Before I met the guy who would be my date we spoke online or maybe on the phone…I forget. I didn’t know that much about him but I did know we were basically the same age. We joked around before meeting each other and he told me that he was 30 years old. I played along with his joke and he never corrected himself. When I met him at the movie theatre the next day, the first thing I said to him was, “Wow, you look young for your age.” I was just carrying on the joke we had from earlier. I was implying that he did not look 30. He thought I was seriously telling him that he looked young. He kept joking the rest of the night that he looks like he is 13 and has a baby face. Needless to say there was no second date. I guess insulting someone doesn’t really give them the desire to spend another evening with you… lesson learned.

I don’t know why I let this be the beginning of a phase, but looking back, it feels as though it was. I decided that I would go out with anyone. I thought, “Why not? What do I have to loose?” So friends set me up with their friends, I went on roommate dates, guys I met at Church, etc. If someone asked or offered to set me up, I went for it, no questions asked. This phase came to end a little over a year later when I got set up to go out with a guy from Auburn, WA. I knew nothing about him. He took me on a really nice date. We rode the ferry to Bremerton, had dinner on the island at this little restaurant. We ate outside as the summer sun set. I spilled on myself and he didn’t even comment on it. He paid for everything. I guess things really came to an end for me when he began sharing his interest in Focus on the Family talk shows with Dr. James Dobson. He was sharing with me an episode he had heard about why young marriages are good. I guess on a first date, this really is a topic that turns me off/freaks me out. Then we missed our ferry back to Seattle because we somehow got lost on the island. When we finally made it back my date somehow managed to kick his sandal off of his foot in mid stride. The sandal went flying through the air and hit an elderly man in the back. I honestly don’t know how this happened. I was embarrassed. When I returned to my apartment and shared the story of my date with my roommates I made the decision to end the “ask no questions, what do I have to loose” phase in my dating life. I didn’t realize then that ending this so called, “phase” could possibly end my dating life altogether.

Years later-a.k.a. Present Day:
I met a guy at the YMCA (gym) on Sunday. He approached me in the hall where I was filling up my water bottle before hitting the fitness room. I was a little awkward because I was aware that this guy had a sight disability (he had a white cane). The line he used on me was: “Are you here to work out?” I equate this to sitting on an airplane and having someone ask you, “So, are you flying somewhere?” I told this guy that I was indeed there to work out and then he used this line: “Do you come here often?” But before I could answer this one, he took a half step backwards and looked me up and down. He then said, “Never mind, I can tell that you do. You are very beautiful. Take that however you want, coming from someone who is seeing impaired.” He explained that he was loosing his eye sight and has severe tunnel vision. We had a small conversation that ended with him asking me out. He called me Monday afternoon and being a woman of my word, I called him back Monday evening ready for our “date”.
We arranged for me to pick him up at a now abandoned grocery store at 6pm. When he appeared in the distance I immediately realized that he wasn’t wearing a shirt. He showed up for our date wearing only black mesh shorts and all white high-top sneakers. For the record, he was classy enough to bring a shirt with him (if you can call a black wife beater a shirt), although he never put it on. We decided to go to the park and walk on the walking trail and get to know each other. I thought this was a good setting for this first date; mostly because my friend Travis regularly goes running on this walking trail. I called Travis to let him know where I would be and we worked out an “I’m in distress” hand signal. Travis agreed to be present and come to my rescue if given the signal.
From the moment I picked up my date, it was apparent that we had nothing in common. He was clearly trying to impress me with his cologne, attention to his body, hours spent in the gym lifting, number of fights he had been in (and won), interest in the Smashing Pumpkins and repeated flattery. As we were getting to know each other he made sure to mention that he likes his apartment clean, doesn’t want to have a roommate unless it’s his next girlfriend and that he does not have any children. As we walked along the trail he kept veering off and walking towards trees and bushes (he conveniently left his cane in the car). Upon the request that he holds my hand, I didn’t know how to say no…I mean the guy was repeatedly walking off the trail and so I regretfully complied.
Around this time, across the trail I spotted Travis in the distance. Part of me was relieved that he showed up and the other part of me was totally embarrassed that Travis was seeing me walking, holding hands with some half naked guy. As my date and I rounded the next corner about a half a mile later, Travis had caught up to us. I managed to get out of holding hands and I gave Travis the distress signal. Travis caught it and a quarter of a mile later, he came to my rescue. Travis was standing at the entrance to the trail and I cut my date off in the middle of a sentence and said, “Travis! Hey! What are you doing here!?” Then I introduced them and Travis invited us to keep walking with him. I could have kissed Travis’ feet for being such a good friend. He carried conversation with my date and acted surprised when we told him that we met at the Y. At the end of our stroll, I told them both that I needed to get home.
I drove my date back to his apartment and told him that I did not see this going anywhere and that I’m not interested in dating him. When we pulled up to his apartment, he asked me to come up. I said no. Then he asked me a second time for a second date. I said no. He told me that he was looking for a girlfriend and to start a relationship. I think that if this was true, he would have listened to what I was saying to him and realized that we had nothing in common. Instead, he just used his tunnel vision to stare at parts of me.